Thursday, May 29, 2008

Please, Please, Please Let Me Get What I Want

There's a song by The Smiths by this name. It's actually the part in Ferris Bueller's Day Off when Cameron is struck by a gorgeous mural of Seurat's scene of families on a beach.

I don't remember the scene, nor did I know the song until two years ago. In fact, I didn't even know who The Smiths were. But everything has changed. And now I'll never look at that painting - or love - the same way again.

I was at the Chicago Art Institute, minding my own business when love brushed across my shoulders. It came in the form of a tall, hopelessly gorgeous man, standing beside me in the German oil painting room. He was more beautiful than any painting I've ever seen. He looked like an Italian model. I looked like a heap of melted paint.

I continued to stare at the painting. He continued to linger about, spreading warm, sexy air onto the periphery of my body. I moved. He moved too. I couldn't get away from the feeling of heat surrounding me like skin. I looked up. He stared. I looked down. He walked away. I looked up, he was staring at me as he walked away. I wanted to vomit.

I was kicking myself for not being more flirtatious, but I never thought someone like that would be interested in me.

A half an hour later, the room was flooded in beauty. Before me was a white room, sun streaming in, and the giant mural of Seurat's families on a beach that moved Cameron in the film. I can see why. One thing I'm sure wasn't in the room during the film, however, was my Italian model. Standing there, in the middle of the room. He turned, just as the sun pierced his body like a dagger, yellow light surrounding his frame like a halo. And there it was. My movie moment.

He was looking right at me. And the closer I got, the closer I felt to something I'd never before experienced. Was I in heaven? Was this real?

"I saw you in the other room," he said.

"I saw you too," I said, trying not to barf.

"My name is Brian," he said, extending his hand.

"I'm..." Dear God, what was my name?

From there, he gave me his Ipod and let me listen to the song from the film. I didn't know what to be more moved by - this gorgeous man providing me with classical music, this amazing painting or the whole experience.

The song is haunting, but even more are the words, which I found online:

Good times for a change
See, the luck Ive had
Can make a good man
Turn bad

So please please please
Let me, let me, let me
Let me get what I want
This time

Havent had a dream in a long time
See, the life I've had
Can make a good man bad

So for once in my life
Let me get what I want
Lord knows, it would be the first time
Lord knows, it would be the first time

I've gotten many things I want in life, but never anything real when it comes to love. It was Brian who opened my eyes to the possibility. I didn't know what I wanted until he showed up. I wanted him.

Life doesn't always play out like a movie, though, and we don't always get what we want. Why else would they write songs about it? I think it would be nice if we could all get what we wanted when it came to love. It would sure make it all a lot easier. And a heck of a lot prettier to look at.


Date Girl said...

I'm really curious to see how this pans out with Brian. Did you talk to him again? Did you get his number?
I wish I could find what I want in love too...sigh. Here's hoping!

Candy Girl said...

Nah, Brian is a thing of the past. He's actually The Mad Scientist (see list on the right nav). I fell hard for this one. So hard I think I cracked my heart right open. Sigh is right...